This article is classified "Real"
Santa Fe, New Mexico, is one of the most beautiful and interesting places in the world. This is, unless you're a teenager living there, in which case it's the most incredibly boring place in the world. It is also one of the most popular tourist spots, despite the fact most natives hate tourists. The reason for this is that, in the eyes of the natives, tourists are stupid. There are many reasons that they think this. The main one is the fact that tourists don't know how to talk right. So in order to make your stay in Santa Fe as enjoyable as possible we give you: "The Idiot's Guide To Santa Fe Names": Name Correct Incorrect ==== ======= ========= Cerillos Say-ree-ous Ker-rill-os Pojauque Po-walk-ee Po-jack-ee Tortilla Tor-ti-ya Tor-till-a Fajita Fah-hi-ta Fah-jee-ta Jemez Hay-mez Jay-mez Albuquerque* Al-boo-ker-ke Al-boo-Kwirk-Kwee (* Actually, this one doesn't matter all that much; see below.) Also, despite what you may have heard in other New Mexico cities, the little candles in bags that are set up around Christmas time are "Farolitos", not "Luminarias," as those in a certain larger city, noted above, say. Santa Feans consider Albuquerque to be a city of idiots who don't know how to talk either.