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The Unfortunate Life of David Kilbourne is a very funny book written by a surprisingly clever Earthman named Mike Rohde [1]. It is a book about the journey of a man, his ex-wife, and a talking Chihuahua, as they attempt to return to Earth after they are abducted by a super-intelligent race of plaid cloth known as the Patchers. Total nonsense, you say? You're right, but what do you want to read? Another of Earth's wordy courtroom books? Or one-thousand pages dedicated to some Navy guys stuck in a submarine? Anyway, check it out at: http://members.gnn.com/MRohde6592/davidk.htm Currently, only excerpts from his book can be viewed at the above site, but he will soon be posting up a few chapters of his book at a time. Unless, of course, he develops amnesia from a freak boating accident, in which case he says he will try really hard to remember to post them. [1] Where do these Earthling's come up with their stupid names?