This article is classified "Real"
There are several uses for a modern wig, or hair piece, which are as
follows:
1) To cover a small bald patch
2) To cover a large bald patch
3) To cover a completely bald head
4) To make you look different
To take the last of these, this is mainly for people who wish to have a
certain type of hair, but who unfortunately have a certain other type of
hair. This can apply for instance to people who have short hair, but want
long hair for a short period without any of the inherent problems, or to
people who have one colour of hair, say brown, and wish to have another, say
green, for an equally short time.
Points 1, 2 and 3 can all work in a similar way to 4, but also have their
own implications and inspiration.
Primarily, someone who wears a wig doesn't want anyone to know that they
don't have any hair underneath it. This is by no means unreasonable. What
is unreasonable is that they expect people to believe that they have a
complete head of hair when it's obvious they don't, because the last
remains of natural hair have a totally different colour to the wig [1].
Chances are that if you wear a wig, you are sensitive about hair loss.
This is quite a reasonable feeling to have, but the acquisition of a wig is
probably not the best answer; it is sometimes less painful just to live with
it, and stop trying to hide it from people [2]. Try not to feel bad about
it [3].
There are many jokes told about people with wigs, more specifically, about
the amusing fact that their appearance is not totally dissimilar to that of
a dead rat or another small furry animal. This is not an excuse to wear a
rat on your head, unless you are prepared to justify this to your
colleagues.
It is possible for a wig to be made of real hair, though this isn't, I
believe, very common these days. At the moment, most wigs are made from
synthetic substances that have a variable likeness, in both texture and
appearance, to real hair. Basically, you pay for the better hair. If you
don't have a lot of money, you're much better off not wearing a wig.
A famous arena for wig wearing would be any of the many studios where chat
shows are filmed, it being well known that most of the more famous chat show
hosts, certainly in the UK, wear wigs [4]. If you are invited onto one of
these shows, on no account bring a portable fan and use it at any time
during your interview.
The author would like to note here that he isn't bald, or balding, though
at some distant point in the future, this might happen. It goes on record
here that he might end up with a rat on his head anyway [5].
[1] Many wigs are famous for almost, but not quite, matching hair colour.
[2] Research states that more people laugh at wigs than at bald people.
[3] Indeed, British comedian, Alexei Sayle, decided that when he began
to go bald, he would shave all his hair off.
[4] This is a matter of speculation, and may or may not be true.
[5] Although I have lived in a house with someone who wears a wig and, from
personal experience, it is quite unpleasant to find the said item
floating in the sink.