This article is classified "Real"
The first day of the month is held to be a special day in many Earth cultures. Strange social rituals are enacted on this day which, although it happens rather regularly, creeps up on you quite unexpectedly. In Britain, for instance, you may be confronted by people who pinch you, then punch you on the arm, and say "Pinch, Punch, First of the Month." The origins of this rather unpleasant custom are lost in time, however I can offer you some useful advice. The only defence against this custom is to pinch and punch first because tradition demands that the pinchee is not allowed to retaliate. There are more pleasant first of the month customs. The first of May is often a holiday - imaginatively called May Day. This has been taken up by various nations including the recently expired communist state of USSR. Britain thoughtfully puts its holidays on the first Monday on or after the first of the month. This is because having a holiday during the weekend is rather redundant because most people would be not working anyway. These Monday holidays are called Bank Holiday's for some archaic reason - but of course banks are not open. Thankfully most large DIY stores are open on Bank Holiday Mondays because a large number of people on holiday do DIY. The reason behind this is unknown, and rather surprising since many DIY enthusiasts can earn enough in that one day to pay for a professional to do the "DIY" work much better than they could themselves.