This article is classified "Fictional"
In recent times much has been heard about a rather counter-intuitive form of
logic called fuzzy logic. To the layperson the advantages of this indecisive
logic variant may not be apparent or indeed plausible. This article however
is intended to educate and inform the reader of this fine Guide.
To start with, most of us are already familiar with fuzzy logic and have
likely even relied on it in the past. Consider a probably all-too-familiar
phenomena: You're in a bar consuming copious quantities of your favourite
inebriating substance. After a short time of heavy drinking your brain, now
operating in fuzzy logic mode thanks to the solvent you've pumped through its
blood system, tells you to make a move on that sexy man/woman/hermaphrodite
dancing by the record machine. You are, after all, extremely beautiful/
handsome/differently gendered and have a high paying job with excellent
advancement potential doing the dishes at the local greasy spoon.
Confidently you push up/suck in/tuck in your sagging breasts/beer gut/extra
reproductive organs and walk up to the beckoning adonis/siren/androgynous
deity and are quickly shot down. With an almost stupefying speed your brain
selects a new target. You're a bit less sure of yourself, more horny, and
so the appearance constraint is relaxed a bit. After several rounds of this
you finally make your way out of the bar with your conquest in tow behind
you. Of course when you wake up in the morning, time will have caused your
brain to revert to boring old standard logic. It's then that you'll decide
that you'd rather gnaw your arm off rather than face the embarrassment of
talking to the beast which you dragged home the night before.
For those who wish to perform some experimentation with fuzzy logic here is
a list of apparatus and an experimental procedure to follow:
Apparatus
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1) One human (yourself will do)
2) Enough inebriating substances to thoroughly saturate the
bloodstream of item number 1. The substances should be
separated into small quantities.
3) One bar (item number 2 may be acquired there)
4) One camera (automatic focus may become a desirable feature as
the experiment progresses) that will produce instant photos.
5) One pen or pencil for marking.
Procedure
---------
1) Place the human (item 1) into the bar (item 3).
2) Carefully empty several quantities of item 2 into the human
(item 1). The blood stream needs a good alcohol-rich starter
mixture.
3) Select a potential amorous partner for the evening, after you
"strike out" use the camera (item 4) to get a picture of
her/him/it and label it with the number 1.
4) Repeat step 2 and 3 until success, labeling each photograph
with 2, 3, 4...
5) Compare the first photograph to that of the woman/man/other
that you woke up with. Contrast the photograph with your
actual partner; how have the parameters for a desirable sexual
partner varied over the course of the night?