This article is classified "Fictional"
If you spend any time near a television receiver (not a good thing to do; consult the Guide on radiation and on intelligence-draining devices) you're bound to see an advertisement for Caramilk chocolate bars. There are several... but they all have a central theme: humans befuddled by "how they get the sweet flowing Caramilk into the centre of each piece of a Caramilk bar." Or words to that effect. In one advert, two "superior beings" are laughing over great mysteries they've left for humans to ponder (such as Stonehenge). The laughing stops when they discover neither of them was responsible for the Caramilk secret. Then we see another, even higher being gloating over them... "Fools... ah hah hah hah...". Another commercial shows dolphins speaking to a human through a computer translator... when asked the Caramilk secret, they laugh and say "Don't you know?". (This is likely to be true.) What follows is the secret to how they get the Caramilk into the Caramilk bar. But first, an overview. Caramilk bars are small chocolate bars produced by a company called Cadbury's headquartered in England. (The bars are small for two reasons: one, they are portable; and two, they have to be small to allow for the enormous cost of the aforementioned advertisements.) If you take a bar, unwrap it and invert it so that the top points downward, you have a shape not unlike a plastic ice cube tray from a refrigerator freezer. (Remember this, it's important.) When the bar is made, two molds are used (the whole procedure is automated and mechanized so that thousands of bars are made per hour). In the first mold, the actual shape of the bar, molten chocolate is poured to about the halfway-full point. Meanwhile, in another machine, a second mold is readied. This one is a similar shape but smaller... and in this one Caramilk is poured into individual spaces. Then the Caramilk pieces are frozen. Yes, frozen - thus creating small, hard, Caramilk "lozenges." These are dropped into the chocolate in the first mold (being frozen Caramilk, they float). Next the "bottom" of the bar is made by covering the whole thing with a second layer of chocolate, enough to fill the mold. When the chocolate has hardened (accelerated somewhat by the frozen Caramilk inside) the bar is popped out, wrapped, packaged, distributed, and sold to an unsuspecting populace. Knowing this information isn't useful in any direct way... the bars taste the same whether you know how they are manufactured or not. But the adverts have created a sort of mystique around the bars, and an alert hitchhiker can usually use this knowledge to his advantage (see: How To Get Free Drinks, when that article gets written). (Caramilk is a trademark of Cadbury's Ltd. and is used here entirely without permission.)