This article is classified "Fictional"
Now that Commodore Business Machines (CBM) has folded, a lot of Amiga users ask themselves the question if they shall continue using the Amiga or look for another machine and then which machine would that be. To answer this question I can tell your there is a self-destruct routine built into version 2.1 of the WorkBench. The news of Commodore's liquidation came across the modem and my Amiga 3000 (25-megahertz '030, 2-meg chip, 4-meg fast), immediately started a ten-second countdown timer on the screen in 80-point type. This wasn't an outline font, so the numbers were pretty jaggy. Naturally, I flipped the switch on the power strip, but somehow the computer and monitor stayed on and the countdown continued. Apparently, it was using the remaining charge in the lithium clock battery. Yanking the cords from the wall didn't help, either, and by the time I finished that, there were only four seconds left. I had no choice except to defenestrate (look it up) the CPU. The monitor was made by another vendor, but it had the Commodore label and it was still turned on, so I threw it out after the CPU and hit the dirt. Well, the explosion that followed immediately afterwards blew out all the plate glass on my whole block. The cops came because of a noise ordinance violation in Davis, and because the remains were still smoking, but they left after I explained what happened. Unfortunately, the house needs a new paint job, and the lawn will probably never grow back right over that crater. Fortunately, the printer was a Panasonic and the modem was a Zyxel, so they are both fine. I'm glad to report that no people were seriously injured, although it was a close thing. Anyway, if this hasn't happened to you yet, there are a couple things you should do. First of all, you should avoid using your modem. If you do, use a third-party serial device (like baudbandit.device or the ones that come with GVP's devices). Second of all, you should shut down your WorkBench and run from CLI, since WB is where the self-destruct code resides. Another work-around is to remove the clock battery and be ready to unplug the computer at short notice. Never leave your machine unattended if you do this. Switching to another version of the OS will NOT help! This routine was coded in from the beginning. I think the programmers and hardware engineers realized the need sometime around Tramiel's departure. The only revision of the self-destruct scheme came with version 2.04 of the OS. Before that version, there was a synthesized voice that did the countdown instead of the numbers on the screen. This means that if you are running a pre-2.04 machine, you should make SURE that you have your speakers hooked up AT ALL TIMES!!! Is it now time to change to a Mac, or even, a PC?! Well, the Mac would probably be the safest bet. MS-DOS has a similar routine that will kick in should Bill Gates ever die/lose control of the company/reproduce, so they are moderately safe for now. If you're really worried, you can switch to DR-DOS. Its self-destruct only kicks in after the last CP/M machine goes to the dump. Windows (3.1 and NT) has a routine that is supposed to do the same thing, but it is so buggy that it just crashes the machine instead. The Macs used to have a "bomb" routine that was set to go off if Steve Jobs ever left the company. Fortunately, the routine was mainly coded by the same people who did the early versions of "Word" for that platform, so the versions released were all really "beta" software. The main effect of the routine were that a lot of white smoke came out of the top of the machine. A few of the Macs turned black and melted down into a vaguely cube-shaped object. Anyway, the routine has since been removed so the OS can handle the 10-key on the keyboard. As a result, modern Macs are now very safe. Be careful with the PowerPC-based machines. Nobody has completely analyzed them yet. However, there is a rumor that when the last mainframe is sold, they will all refuse to run emulators for anything but CMS. The casualty rate from this is expected to be extremely high.