This article is classified "Partly real, partly fictional"
Malinda McCall (mmccall@unix.cc.emory.edu) writes: >My loving and wonderful boyfriend is congenitally unable to discern when >there is only one square left on a roll. I buy 24-pack TP and stick them >under the sink and we have three displayed rolls. I'd be happy if he >grunted to me when the TP under the sink was low and I'd go buy more and >hang it all my damn self. :) I used to think this was a guy-thing (husband, brother, father, grandfather all suffered from same deficiency) until we got custody of my hubby's daughter. I've since learned that the trait is not sex linked, but it is genetic. I've started doing polls at family reunions, and I'm finding out that the ability to replace toilet paper (and to let the toilet paper buyer know when supplies are low) are recessive; therefore the trait only shows up when both parents carry a toilet-paper replacement gene, and then not in all their children. (I was the lucky one in my family.) The sad thing is that if both parents are TP replacers (meaning they each have two TPR genes), then they and all their children are anal-retentive, and the bathroom is usually so full of extra toilet paper rolls that one can't use the bathtub or shower stall because of the extra supplies. (These are the people you see in Sam's buying four or five of the 24-roll packs. They are also the ones who carry their own toilet paper with them every time they go out, since they fear having to use a public restroom where there may not be enough or any toilet paper.) There is also a correlation between the TPR gene and the KR (Kleenex Replacement Gene), PTR (Paper Towel Replacement Gene) and NR (Napkin Replacement Gene). People who are deficient in these genes are easily recognizable by: Yucky mucus stains on shirt sleeves (KR deficient); Wet, hand-shaped marks on their pants (PTR deficient) and details of their most recent meal anywhere on their clothing (NR deficient). So the next time you have to replace the toilet paper, just remember, they can't help it.