This article is classified "Real"
People who shop after midnight are a particular breed. There aren't many places for one to shop after midnight, mostly composed of grocery stores and convenience marts. The convenient thing about shopping at odd hours is that there is no one to impress. So-called "Normal People" actually have the idyllic delusion that they might run into someone that they have the need of impressing. Thus, the people that you see browsing the racks at 2 in the AM aren't the kind of people you see on "Lifestyles of the Rich and Delusioned" -- they're more the kind of people you happen across in the pages of National Geographic passed out on the sidewalks of Debuke. This makes it the perfect time for your given hitchhiker to catch a ride, since most of these people have had their egos stomped on so by society that they are willing to help out anyone who will give them the time of day. There are certain people you should avoid, as a rule. The first of these is the Housewife. The Housewife will appear as if she is straight out of a bad Rosanne clone, and is usually armed with either mace, or pictures of her kids. Either of these could be very detrimental to your health. The second is the Lost Lover. The Lost Lover is usually in search of alcohol. While this can be good, the alcohol in question can often be wine, and they may just be on a quick trip to stock up, and will be so occupied with thoughts of what awaits him and his bottle of love, he will respond to any attempt to divert his path with possibly deadly force. The third, and possibly most dangerous, is the "Normal Person" that is just accidently out after midnight, and is scared that if anyone sees them, they will be embarrassed forever, and will interpret any attempts at introduction as violent, since they have also been shown what kind of people inhabit stores after midnight on "Cops." As long as you stay away from these three groups, your visits to stores after midnight should be very happy and prosperous.