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Ford Motors of North America has released a new sub-compact car called "Aspire." Seemingly based upon the Opal-engineered car that used to be sold as the "Passport Optima" and then in the early 90's as a Pontiac, the Aspire has the typical rounded bubble-car looks that Ford seems to think that we need more of. It comes in a lovely array of designer colours (sorry, I will not be caught dead in a purple car, or at least in this purple) that are meant to attract the eye of young car buyers. "Aspire" is a rather interesting name to give a car. Rather than an object, such as a Lynx or Mustang, or even the heavily tested composites of syllables such as Integra or Celica, Ford has given this car a name that seems to reflect an emotional state. We are often asked, "what do you aspire to be," and our parents have aspirations for us to be doctors, lawyers, happy, healthy, successful, etc. Maybe we aspire to drive a Ford Aspire? What marketing! Perhaps it is Ford that is aspiring to be a successful car company again, and hoping that the Aspire will lead them there. The problem with the name Aspire is this: look up the word aspire in a French dictionary. Go ahead, turn to the French half and find the word "aspirer." Tell me what it means. If you do not have a French dictionary, I will tell you. "Aspirer" means "to inhale." Now, pull out your Thesaurus and look up "inhale." Here you will find the following synonyms: breathe in, puff, suck. Yes, the 1995 Ford Sucks, perfect! Maybe Ford has finally gotten the idea, and are admitting to their shortfalls! Maybe the car-naming gurus at Ford were looking for new jobs anyway, so naming the car was just their way of getting a severance package? I remember the movie "Crazy People" when they were making up new slogans for cars such as "Volvo: Boxy, not Sexy" or "You can't have sex in a Porsche, but you will when you get out." How about "People might think that you suck so why not buy a Ford Aspire and prove it". Thank you, Ford Motors, I'll stick to my Saturn SL1.