This article is classified "Real"
If you are in the vicinity of Leicester Square, London, UK, Earth, at around 11:30 on a Friday evening, then chances are that you have been chucked out of a pub due to closing time, or you have seen a West End musical. You may want to try the Haag'n Das ice cream, or one of a multitude of fast food outlets, or go into Chinatown for chinese food. However, any sighted person will realize that the main entertainment in Leicester Square is cinemas. There are more cinemas than can be easily counted (i.e., more than eight fingers and two thumbs). One of the smaller cinemas just off the Northern side of Leicester Square is the Prince Charles. At this time of night, a group of people will be putting on makeup, straightening their tights and basques, and adjusting their wigs, and fake genitals. These people are the Charming Underclothes. These foolish people perform in front of the film The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Foolish - because they don't get paid. They do it for the thrill of it. At a cost of six pounds to watch, this is fairly typical of central London cinemas (usually seven pounds), however the usual cost of a Prince Charles film ticket is just 2 pounds. (Fortunately for some the student price of 2.99 is available.) The usual faire of the Prince Charles is old Chinese martial arts films, and American films either one or forty years old. Rocky Horror Picture Show is nearly twenty years old, so it isn't exactly a current Hollywood smash hit. The Cast -------- These people are mostly Londoners for whom time has passed by untouched. Try telling them that they are idolizing a film which was made whilst they were still in kindergarten and they will probably tell you to sod off. Costumes -------- Lots of Basques, fish net tights, Y-Fronts (1 pair), white bra and nickers, lab coats (white and green), rubber gloves (pink), dark glasses, big feathers, some chiffon, gold lamee swimming trunks, fluffy scarf things, various things with lots of sequins in, leather jackets (several). And that's just the audience! MakeUp ------ This is one of the most distinctive aspects of the costume. Don't ask me to describe hairstyles or patches of black and white on people's faces. I can't. Wait for the multimedia version of this article. Cast Props ---------- A Ray gun (capable of emitting a beam of pure anti-matter), a newspaper, a car, a motorbike, an aquarium, a trifid, some celluloid jam, and some rattles. Night Buses ----------- Whenever you go somewhere in London you don't really want to drive - unless you know for certain that you can park when you get there. Most people go by Tube. Unfortunately the Tube closes down around 12 which is just when things are heating up, so you have to find some other way back home. You can hail a taxi (these are mostly black, or look like they have been covered by enlarged copies of the Financial Times which is pink). Or more better: get a night bus. These are strange beasts which follow none of the route plans of their diurnal counterparts. You can usually catch Night Buses from Trafalgar Square where they all seem to congregate. (Safety in numbers or something). After a wait of between two minutes and two hours you get on your night bus. Invariably someone realizes that they have been waiting at the wrong bus stop for the last twenty minutes and you are cheered up by the sight of misfortune greater than you own. Once you actually get on your night bus and have paid the flat fee, the night bus finally takes you from Trafalgar Square to where you want to go. Unfortunately it visits every bus stop between Trafalgar Square and where you want to go, and a few three miles off course as well. Once you get off the bus you may have other problems to deal with. It has been known for cast to kept away from their front doors by ira bomb alerts (police cordon off the streets), but worst of all is trying to pass the all night Domino's Pizza take-away without buying any pizza. PropBags and Audience Participation ----------------------------------- A major part of the atmosphere of Rocky Horror is audience participation. It is the only film I know where you can shout out "ASSHOLE" at the screen and not be shushed into silence. I should know. I've tried it a few times. But most audience participation is more subtle than that. Some of the first things that you need from your prop bag (should you buy one instead of bringing one yourself) are rice and confetti. This is to be thrown at other members of the audience in the opening wedding scene. Later on there is a thunderstorm and I can seriously recommend bringing a waterproof newspaper to protect yourself with. I once brought "Computing" (a UK weekly) and got picked on by the stage crew. (Tip: Never think you have the biggest water pistol. The stage crew always have one bigger.) If you are lucky you may find a condom or two in your bag. This is for blowing up with air and bouncing on people's heads. (Well, that's all I have seen the audience do with them.) Most good audience participation takes the form of a discussion between the audience and the screen. If you know when Frank says "Excellent!" then you can shout out "What do you think of Bill and Ted's Adventure?" just before. When the criminologist says the phrase "black and pendulous" it usually follows the audience saying "DESCRIBE YOUR BALLS." Audience participation jokes do get a bit better than shouting expletives. Rehearsals ---------- Never enough. Always too early on a Sunday morning. Most people aren't even awake on a Sunday morning. Columbia's Bits --------------- Well I did have lots to say about Columbia's breasts, but I better not in case I start to drool. For a film about free sex and pleasure to excess there is very little nudity and bad language in the film. Sexy underwear is almost always better than nudity, and the film contains only the one "Fuck." The Plot -------- Sod the plot. The plot is almost non-existent. Don't see this film for the plot. The Characters -------------- Nah, it'll spoil the plot. The Show -------- The Rocky Horror Picture Show was based on the Rocky Horror Show - a play which was twenty-one years old this year.