Metric Prefixes

Dubious Metrics

by Anonymous (Anonymous)
written 29 Jul 1994

This article is classified "Real"


Dubious Metrics
---------------
A millihelen is the amount of beauty required to launch one ship.

A microhelen is the amount of beauty required to motivate one sailor.

A megahelen is the amount of beauty required to make the sailor think in
any other terms than a one-night stand.

But this is all rather bogus, since we are applying metric prefixes to
Troy units.


Other Dubious Metrics
---------------------
10^12 dactyls            = 1 teradactyl
10^15 philes             = 1 petaphile
10^18 stentials          = 1 exastential
10^21 piccolos           = 1 gigolo
10^18 minations          = 1 examination
10^15 coats              = 1 petacoat
10^12 bulls              = 1 terabull
10^12 microphones        = 1 megaphone
10^12 pins               = 1 terrapin
billions and billions    = 1 Sagan
10^9 lows                = 1 gigalow
10^9 antics              = 1 gigantic
10^9 questions           = 1 gigawhat
10^9 micrometers         = 1 kilometer
                         = 200 pentameters
10^6 bicycles            = 2 megacycles
10^6 airs                = 1 millionair
2^10^3 millinaries       = 4 seminaries
                         = 1 binary
2x10^3 mockingbirds      = 2 kilo mockingbird
1000 Kowalskis           = 1 Kilokowalski

("Killer" Kowalski was a well-known professional wrestler from about
20 years ago.)

10 cards                 = 1 decacard
10 decor                 = 1 hector
10 dence                 = 1 decadence
10 halls with boughs of holly = decahalls with etc.
10 millipedes            = 1 centipede
10 monologues            = 5 dialogues
                         = 1 decalogue
10 rations               = 1 decoration
5 holocausts             = 1 Pentecost
3 1/3 tridents           = 1 decadent
2 bulls                  = 1 Pair a bull
2 homosexuals            = 1 bisexual
1 centipede/second       = 1 velocipede
1/2 Soviet press agency  = 1 demitasse
10^-1 mate               = 1 decimate
10^-2 mentals            = 1 centimental
10^-3 ink machines       = 1 millink machine
10^-3 on                 = 1 million
10^-5 dollars            = 1 Millicent
10^-6 fish               = 1 microfiche
10^-6 scopes             = 1 microscope
10^-9 goats              = 1 nanogoat
10^-9 Nanettes           = 1 nanoNanette
10^-12 boos              = 1 picoboo
10^-12 boulevards        = 1 pico-boulevard
10^-12 dillies           = 1 picodilly
10^-15 fatales           = 1 femtofatale
10^-15 bismol            = 1 fepto bismol
10^-18 boys              = 1 atto boy

nano-nano                = a prefix designating 10^-18

See also:
  • Weird Units Of Measure
  • Metric System

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