Computer Jargon Made Easy

Jargon In The World Of Computers

by Jenni Gregor (jgregor@mcs.dundee.ac.uk)
written 23 May 1994

This article is classified "Real"


The following is a list of computer jargon, with a brief explanation.


Bus Error
---------
Non-attendance of lecture, due to missing the bus.


Compilation
-----------
A list of the processors favorite errors.  Such error compilations
include "Now That's What I Call A Parse Error", and "Hard-core Core-Dumps,
Vol 6."


Editor
------
Person who uses an editor - see editor.


Emacs
-----
An editor designed for use by 2nd years, having it forced upon them by
sadistic lecturers who insist it's much better than vi, but refuse to
tell you how to use it.


Jargon
------
A term made up by computer experts as a euphemism for "talking shit."


JGregor
-------
An output device connected to processor via a sun terminal which
interrupts any logged on user with shite and surreal jokes (see mail
tool).


Lab
---
A room where people in advanced states of inebriation retire to at
chucking out time, to send silly and usually illiterate messages to
their favorite victim - see mail tool.


Mail Tool
---------
Used as a medium for people to annoy other users by sending rubbish
jokes, then leaving the room before anyone decides to beat them up
(the words pot, kettle, and black instantly spring to mind).


Parse
-----
An amalgam of the two words "penis" and "arse", derived from the standard
computer programmers phrase "I'll be BUGGERED if I can see the problem."


Segmentation Fault
------------------
What happens when you try to access a part of an orange you do not own.


Terminal
--------
The condition of anyone who prefers playing Mud to sleeping, eating
or drinking.


Vi
--
An editor designed for use by first years, having it forced upon them by
sadistic lecturers who insist emacs is much better, but refuse to tell
you how to use it.


Window
------
What most peoples tempers go out of when you just spent six hours
writing an extremely difficult program and the system goes down.

See also:
  • Avoiding Computer Obsolescence
  • Knights Of The Command Line, The
  • Booting, Origin Of The Word

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