This article is classified "Real"
Junk Mail is becoming a significant problem in many parts of the (known)
galaxy. As well as the physical problems of being unable to fit real
(personal) mail into the mail box (or other delivery receptacle, hall,
etc), if you are foolish enough to attempt reading it, a great chunk of
time will have passed by when you finish. It may even be dinner time!
(Of course if you receive your post in the evening, it will be breakfast
at this point.) If it was really powerful stuff you will soon be the
proud owner of something you never wanted, and will never use.
Of course whilst actually hitchhiking it is difficult for any mail at all
to get through (though odd cases have been known). Most hikers will
however return to some semblance of home at some point (if only for a
cup of tea), and if not careful may find if full of junk mail.
It therefore becomes necessary to avoid receiving junk mail or, at worst,
to avoid reading it. However we must balance this against the chance of
loosing some "Real mail" in the process. Amongst the problems is how to
tell "real" mail from "junk" without reading it (as that would defeat the
purpose).
Here follows several junk mail avoidance measures, in no particular
order:
1) Move house. This is most effective if you also don't tell
anyone about the move, to avoid having mail redirected. It
is a very expensive way to avoid junk mail, may loose some
important "real" mail and some would say it is a little
excessive, but if you have ever subscribed to 'Reader's
Digest' it may be the only way.
2) Become a hermit, and refuse all mail. Rather drastic, and
often not as much fun as it sounds.
3) Never return from your hitchhiking. Fun, but may be
impractical for some.
4) Don't forget to tick the box on any competitions or special
offers you may be foolish enough to enter/send away for that
says "If you don't want us to sell your name, personal
details, location, etc to as many junk mailers as we possibly
can tick here," if there is one.
5) Envelope filtering. Immediately throw out, unopened, any
envelope that looks like junk mail. Telltale signs are
writing like:
"You could be the winner of <lots-of-money>"
"Reader's Digest"
"Don't throw this away"
Be careful not to throw away envelopes with writing on like:
"Final Demand"
"Overdue Account"
as you may get into trouble.
6) Peephole method. Most mechanically produced mail these days
seems to come in the ubiquitous "Window envelopes." These
windows can be used to carefully check the contents of an
envelope without having enough to get trapped into reading
it. Where the contents are clearly junk, they can be thrown
away immediately.
7) Spell your name (slightly) wrong when entering competitions,
etc. Then after the competition is over, and you have
received the standard "Sorry, you didn't win, but let us tell
you about our great new product anyway" type letter, simply
throw out all mail addressed to this incorrect spelling. If
you use lots of misspellings you can trace who is selling
your name to whom. Be wary of this method if your name is
one commonly given to misspelling, or if your handwriting is
worse than your doctor's.
8) As an alternative to throwing mail away, return it marked
"Not known at this address." This will usually get you
deleted from the mailing list, unless it's sent by "Reader's
Digest" who are wise to these attempts.
9) If all else fails, you could try writing to the people who
mailed you, threatening law suits, physical violence or junk
mailings (as appropriate). Be wary that they may take this
as a positive sign.
Dealing with loose junk mail: This kind of junk mail is generally
safer, as it's generally just trying to get you to shop somewhere else,
or buy something different from normal. It is harder to avoid, as
everyone gets it, regardless of past sins, competition entries, etc. It
is also far more easily recognized as it looks completely different from
normal mail. Some more dangerous forms of this pretend to be
newspapers. This form do make good fire-lighting material however.
Don't forget that only 0.1% of mailees have to respond to junk mail to
make it profitable. Don't encourage them by being a part of the 0.1%!