This article is classified "Real"
So you've just arrived in London? Well bully for you. Samuel Johnson
once said:
"When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life"
This statement accounts for the many hitchhikers seen jumping off London
bridges and breaking their necks on the Thames; however, if you have the
right attitude, London is a great place for you to visit.
Arriving and Departing
----------------------
From the Airport:
Heathrow: If you want to get to or from Heathrow, the easiest
way is by Underground. It takes about 70 minutes and costs
about 2.30 pounds. To reach Victoria, transfer at Earls Court.
Gatwick: Take the BR Gatwick express train to Victoria,
approximately 30 minutes and 7 pounds.
By Train:
The London Underground, or Tube, is a relatively fast and cheap
way of getting around London. If you are coming from or going
to somewhere outside of London, trains leave from 8 stations:
Charing Cross, Euston, King's Cross, Liverpool Street, Paddington,
St. Pancras, Victoria, and Waterloo.
By Coach:
Victoria Coach station is where most busses arrive and depart.
Busses are generally cheaper, but slower and (IMHO) less
comfortable.
By Thumb:
The preferred method of hitchhikers is best undertaken with the
list of route suggestions published by the Tourist Information
Centre.
Touring
-------
A tour is a good way to get your bearings in London, and a quick glance
from the top of one of London's famous double decker busses will help you
decide what to see in more detail.
The London Transport sightseeing tour last 1-1/2 hours and departs from
Victoria St, Marble Arch and Baker St., Haymarket (near Picadilly circus).
These tours cost 8 pounds and depart every 1/2 hour. Also available, the
London by Night tour, costing 3.50 pounds. Phone 222-1234 for details.
Money
-----
For the average hitchhiker, this is a commodity rarely in abundance. If
you don't have any, find some Americans and sell one of London's many
bridges to them (well, it's worked before).
If you have money that you acquired outside the country, the chances are
that it will not be accepted. The best places to exchange it for the
local stuff are:
American Express: 6 Haymarket, SW1. Phone 930-4411. Other
offices at Victoria St. Station and the British Tourist office.
Thomas Cook: 15 Shaftsbury Ave.
Medical
-------
Socialised medicine means you can afford to get sick in England which is
helpful for the people who can't afford to see the sights. You may have to
pay for little things, depending on what arrangements have been made between
the UK and your country/planet. Some major hospitals are:
Westminster Hospital, phone 828-9811
University College Hospital, phone 387-9300
London Hospital, phone 377-7000
Accommodations
--------------
Accommodation will cost you. The best suggestion is to find an attractive
member of which ever sex or species you are interested in and shack up with
them. If that fails, try one of these IYHA hostels:
Holland House. Holland Walk, Kensington, W8. Phone 937-0748.
Bright and clean with 190 beds. Kitchen facilities and currency
exchange available. No curfew. 14 pounds/person. Breakfast:
2.30 pounds. Dinner: 3 pounds.
Oxford Street. 14-18 Noel St., London W1. Phone 734-1618.
Great central location. 87 beds, microwave available.
Monitored baggage room and no curfew. 15 pounds per person with
continental breakfast available for 1.90 pounds. Reception open
7am - 10.30pm.
Earl's court, 38 Bolton Gardens SW5. Phone 373-7083. 124 beds
with laundry and currency exchange available. Reception open
7am - 11pm. 12 pound per person with meals 2-3 pounds.
Food
----
Hitchhikers can find some comfort in the fact that they will not have to
change their diets in London; there are just as many McDonald's stores and
pizza shops here as any other major city. If you feel like something
cooked by people over the age of 15, try one of these restaurants:
Chutneys, 124 Drummond St. NW1. Phone 388-0604. If you like
hot curries this is the place to go. The Chefs have come
straight from India in an attempt to burn away the inside of your
mouth.
Mickey's Fish and Chips, 9 Porchester Rd W2. Phone 229-4161.
This is the sort of food you will either love or bring up. The
fish are as fresh as the day they floated ashore dead from the
North Sea, and are served with heaps of chips all cooked in a
vat of boiling fat. If that doesn't sound appetizing, I don't
know what will!
Tradewinds, 42 Baker St. W1M. Phone 486-2008. A Chinese
restaurant that also serves Thai food. Specialty is Peking
Duck, unless of course your a duck.
Sydney Street, 4 Sydney St. SW3. Phone 352-3433. If you have
come halfway across the world and you start to get home sick
what do you do? If you are like me and feel the call of the
wind whistling though some far away gum tree then this is a
place for some Australian food and to meet other Australians you
wouldn't give the time of day to if you were back there.
Pubs
----
If you need to recover from a bad case of jet lag (or space lag), you will
probably want to head for a good pub. With over 7,000 pubs in London, it
would take you a lifetime and two livers to visit them all, but here are a
few to get you started:
The French House, 49 Dean St., W1. In WWII this pub was the HQ
of the free French forces. Serves French food along with a
good selection of wine and some beers.
The Zetland Arms, 2 Bute St., SW7. Famous for its pub food
including Ploughman's lunch and Shepherd's pie.
The Scarsdale, 23 Pembroke Sq,. W8. Great pub right in the
middle of Earl's Court. Inexpensive and a great place for a
chat.
Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell St., WC1. Once a favourite of
Karl Marx and Casanova; with thirteen beers on tap it will
become your favourite also.
Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese, Wine Office court, 145 fleet St., EC4.
This pub is right out of the 17th century, with sawdust on the
floors.
Sights
------
Although frowned on by more seasoned hitchhikers, sight seeing is still
something you may wish to do in London. Don't expect to be able to see
them all, not unless you plan to stay for several years. Some of the more
popular sights in London are:
Westminster Abbey:
This is a big church where you can find the graves of many of England's most
famous dead, including many Kings and Queens. This is also the place where
coronations are held, although one is not likely to happen in the near
future. Those who wish to learn the history of the abbey can take the
guided tour which takes 1-1/2 hours and costs 6 pounds. General admission
to the abbey costs 2.60 pounds, with students 1.30 pounds.
The Houses of Parliament:
This is the seat of Democracy in the western world. Unfortunately, due to
explosive tensions (or is that tensioned explosives) the public is now
restricted from entry into the house. The house amongst other things holds
Big Ben (a large clock named after a fat guy). To get tickets you will
need to see your Embassy, and then be related to the Ambassador. An easier
way to get in is to sit in the visitor's gallery in the House of Lords.
Trafalgar Square:
Right in Trafalgar Square is Nelson's Column. This monument commemorates
Admiral Nelson, whose greatest victory at Trafalgar also led to his death.
Adjoining the square is the National Gallery which houses a collection of
old masters.
Buckingham Palace:
This is where the Queen lives. Due to financial difficulties she will give
you a tour for a few pounds. The changing of the guards happen at 11:30am.
Nearby you can visit the Guard's Museum for 2 pounds, or the Royal Mews
Museum for 1.30 pounds.
Hyde Park:
This is the biggest park in London and a nice place to go if you like that
sort of thing. Within the grounds of the park is Kensington Palace. The
Prince and Princess of Wales used to live here; who gets the house still
remains to be seen.
Harrods:
This is probably the most famous department store in this sector of the
Galaxy. Harrods sells virtually everything, but it's fun just having a
look. Harrods also has a pub, a restaurant and a tourist information
centre.
Madame Tussaud:
This museum holds wax figures of many famous and infamous people. The
Chamber of Horrors holds gory exhibits with people from Jack the Ripper to
Adolf Hitler. Admission is 5.95 pounds.
St Paul's Cathedral:
This cathedral, although not in the original building, has been here since
604AD. Work started on the current cathedral in 1666. This cathedral is
most recently famous for the wedding of Prince Charles and Lady Diana. The
Crypt below contains the resting place of many famous people including
Wellington. Admission is 2 pounds.
The Tower of London:
The Tower was founded in 1066 by William the Conqueror. The tower is in
fact a collection of 20 towers surrounded by a stone wall. There is so much
to see at the tower that I cannot hope to cover it all; needless to say it
is well worth your time. Admission is 6 pounds. Next to the tower is the
Tower Bridge which provides great views from its upper level. Admission to
the upper level is 2.50 pounds.
HMS Belfast:
This ship led the D-Day attacks on the French Coast. Take the tube to
London Bridge. Admission is 3.60 pounds.
The Royal Botanic Gardens:
The Gardens contain many attractions including Kew Palace, which holds a
small museum showing the life of a Monarch in the 18th century. Also, take
a look at the Princess of Wales Conservatory, The Temperate House, and the
Pagoda. Admission to the Palace is 1.00 pounds.
Windsor Castle:
Built by William the Conqueror as a fortress, the castle has been the
birthplace of most of the royals ever since. The tombs of Henry VIII,
George V, and Charles I rest amongst others (admission is 2.00 pounds).
Also to be seen by visitors are the State apartments (admission is 2.90
pounds) and Queen Mary's giant dolls house (admission is 1.45 pounds).