This article is classified "Fictional"
The idea of collecting Guide entries is not as funny as many modern people
believe. The idea is clearly very old. Some people say that the origin of
the idea is lost in the mists of time, but the Plithkud people of Albidris
IV claim credit for it in the name of their founding father of philosophy,
Sendri Cholkuth Bork Bork Bork (name shortened for presentational purposes).
The Shimil people of Albidris IV are not surprised at this claim, but they do
not credit it. "Those Plithkuds are a bunch of idea-thieving, good for
nothing morons. They haven't had an original thought in eons, and that old
charlatan blowhard piece of dried-up turd was the worst of the lot. He's an
embarrassment to the whole planet, not to mention the Plithkuds, which we
hardly ever do."
Still, perseverance in the face of criticism is a Plithkud ideal ("They need
it," say the Shimils). Researchers from the Imperial University at Gondanala
say that the Plithkuds are the second most perseverant people in the galaxy
(they talk like that -- they're academics). The most perseverant, they go on
to say (as we know they would -- academics love to talk), are the Jogoth
people of Aniander III. The Jogoths have the most highly advanced
bureaucracy ever devised by any sentient species. In order to eat breakfast
the normal Jogoth has to fill out seventeen forms in triplicate, indicating
what they intend to eat, how they intend to prepare it, who will be eating
with them (the other people also have to fill out seventeen forms, and the
bureaucrats will not stint in their efforts to check the forms against each
other), what the seating arrangement will be at the table (an extra form
required if the meal is to be served at the counter, and another if it is to
be eaten standing up), what steps have been taken to ensure that no one
present has had this same dish for breakfast in the past ten days, and a
dozen other forms besides. Rather than being daunted for this, the average
Jogoth affirms that "it's nice to have some light paperwork to get you
started in the morning."
The Plithkuds are not bothered by the accusations of their neighbors. "Those
Shimils are just a bunch of liars," they say. "And jealous, too," they add,
"because their philosophers didn't think up as many things as our
philosophers." "Get real," say the Shamils. "Thhhhphphpht," say the
Plithkuds.